Of Bears and Penguins

I just got back from a weekend in Columbia. While it did my heart, soul and body no end of good to be there, it is enormously difficult to be back here in Baltimore. Or rather, back here in Baltimore working in the place I work.

I seem, in my short life, to have a knack for not only taking the road less traveled, but also the road most difficult.

As I sit here with a cup of tea, in the early morning light, preparing to leave in a little less than half an hour – a lesson plan still to be printed, a bag to be packed, hair to be put up and shoes put on – I feel a resistance in my very muscles. While it is typical that I carry all my stress in my shoulders, I’ve never felt such a visceral reaction in my whole body to my present situation. My stomach knots uncomfortably, my entire upper body tenses its muscles.

In the time I’ve been here, I’ve had people encourage me to quit, and people encourage me to stay. And while I won’t say which route I prefer, I know that for better or for worse there are about 45 fourth graders who may not think me the best teacher, but expect to see me at the front of their classroom each day.

Thoughts to be continued…for now I’ve got to get to school, God go with me now as always.